Moving In Our First Mom

Six.  That’s how old my Rylee had turned the week before. It was so bittersweet, but we celebrated by hosting her first “kid” party, bounce castle included.  She’d just started Kindergarten, D had a month off before he started his new job, our house was covered in construction dust and we were still settling in as a family of three, just six short months after our wedding.  My mom has always said I thrive in chaos and maybe that’s true.  When things seem simple, I start to stir.

I went to church alone the day after the party. I can’t remember why, but maybe if my whole family would’ve been there, I’d have been distracted and this story wouldn’t have unfolded.  I sat quietly and quite possibly for the first time in my life, I took notes on the bulletin.  In the moment, it didn’t seem like that life altering of a sermon.  Jesus calls us to do hard things, “The Best is Yet to Come: Faith to Take Risks”.   Whether you live a faith based life or not, you’ve heard that message in some form.  We’ve all seen missionaries, first responders, servicemen and women, surgeons in the ER. These people have to do the hard things so we celebrate, honor and support them, but I’d safely guess most of us are silently thankful we get to watch from the comfort of the sidelines.   D is always talking about how politically or socially people will so adamantly take a stance on something in the media or on social media, but they never do anything about it.  They’re pro-life, but they’ve never visited a pregnancy resource center, helped a single mom or they’re adamantly against government support for these women, but enough about politics. For more information on a political debate, you can reach out to him 😊

That afternoon, I was scrolling Facebook/Insta/checking email and likely wasting time I didn’t have.  I just so happened to come across a post from a resource center I happened to follow.  One time, and one time only I sent this resource center diapers; that was the extent of my relationship with Rustic Hope, but regardless, I enjoyed watching what they were doing from the sidelines.  How comfy.  One mom, one time, got a pack of diapers from me, so go ahead and check that off as my good deed.  Keep scrolling and refresh the feed.  The same message showed at the top of my feed again, “Looking for shelter for a mom and her baby for 30 days in or around Sidney ASAP”.  Good thing I don’t live in Sidney so this didn’t apply to me.  Moving on to troll around on what pyramid scheme Susie from high school is selling. 

I went to bed that night thinking about that post.  I wondered what it was like to be a mom with a baby and no support, no home.  To literally have someone advertising you on Facebook because that’s the only option left.  You see, I’ve been a single mom.  It’s hard and it’s lonely, isolating and embarrassing at times.  You feel like you’ve failed and maybe you have, but through that season I never lost support.  Parents, friends, coworkers. I had a successful career and a home that I owned. I never worried about food or providing for my daughter; we had more than enough.  When I got married I often felt a pull to help other single moms.  I knew of a group that did some career coaching and resume writing and kept thinking I should go serve in that capacity and never did.  So I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep and forget about the Facebook Mom and her baby, only I couldn’t.  I heard the words of the message at church over and over.  “ Jesus asks us to do hard things.  He doesn’t call the qualified, he qualifies the called”.  I certainly wasn’t qualified, but I knew that night I was called.

I woke up and ran 7 miles.  I run a half marathon every year with my friends to honor a daughter lost at a very young age and this was the heart of the run season for me (which by the way, this is the only time I run).  I hadn’t slept much still up wrestling with how to help this mom.  I sent a message on Facebook, “ Hey Connie, we’re not in Sidney, but if she could come to Troy we have space.”  I didn’t expect a response.  She had asked for Sidney, and we were thirty minutes away.  Less than 5 minutes later, I saw a notification.  “Just ignore the message Katie, there’s still time to turn back”, I thought to myself. After all, this lady I’m messaging doesn’t even know me!  “Can she come today?  Job and Family Services was paying for a hotel but she needs to be out by 10”.  It was 8:50 am.  I shake D, who happened to be sleeping in.  “Babe, I think we need to move in a homeless girl, can you wake up?”  I won’t even tell you how he actually responded, but use your imagination.  It was a hard NO with a side of “you’re crazy”.  He wanted a background check, a family history, a record of all parking tickets, a blood sample, all the things…or at least to know her name and why she was homeless and assurance that she wasn’t an axe murderer.  “I’m sure it’s safe and I just really can’t say no.  I feel really called to this.”  Lots of discussion, quiet contemplation and heavy persuasion from me and he agreed to it.  By agreed, I mean he said, “ok fine”.

I sent the message back “we can help, just let me know what I need to do”.

A very compassionate police officer paid for them to stay another night in the hotel.  We set up our crib, bought some toiletries and freshened up our in-law’s suite.   On Tuesday, September 17th at 1pm a lady showed up driving a government owned mini van.  I unloaded trash bags of belongings, a stroller, baby swing, some canned food and a girl, just barely 19 with her son, just barely 4 months.  The children’s services lady checked my house for running water and no infestation in the pantry, that was all.  I begged her for answers to about 100 questions all surmising to mean “what do I do with them?” and she left me with this,  “someone will be in touch in a couple days, I was just here to drop her off”.  She left me someone else’s business card to contact and drove away.

I looked at the girl and smiled.  She wouldn’t make eye contact, but said “hi” back.  The baby was crying in the dining room, being rocked in his seat by my Rylee. “What’s your baby’s name?” I asked.  “Michael,” she mumbled. My husband came out to help gather bags and the three of us walked back inside.  “We’re glad you’re here, “I said as I gave her a tour of the house and showed her where she’d be staying.  I turned to leave and said, “let us know if there’s anything we can do to help”. 

I had no idea how profound of a statement that would be until months later when that same girl had to ask me for more help than I’d ever imagine I could give.  Outside a courtoom, both of us early in our second pregnancies, she quietly asked, “ Would you be willing to adopt Michael?”.

Check back each Tuesday as we share a new chapter of this story.  Be sure to check out our Instagram for even more updates.  →

This Post Has 16 Comments

  1. Josh

    So amazing Katie – can’t wait to hear more of the story! God is good. -Josh
    (And well written 😄)

  2. Emma Klips

    This is incredible and you are an amazing writer. Every line. ❤️ You are a light and you have always been one of my hero’s in this world. I’m so glad you are sharing this journey!

  3. Amanda

    Oh, Katie!! I’ve been watching this sweet baby grow up in your pictures. Love love love your story. Such a compassionate soul you are!

  4. Tiffany

    Beautiful ❤️ Love hearing the story God unfolded.

  5. Catherine

    Heart touching in so many ways and you took a very huge leap of faith. God bless you, D and all!

    1. Sierra Castle

      Such an admirable thing to do!! Chad and I had decided after we had our son and while i was pregnant with our second child that after the complications we had had with our first and were having again with our second that if we were going to want to have any more that we would adopt… There are so many people in the world who need help and just a chance given on them. You guys have done an awesome thing for this lil boy!!

  6. Heather Mehl

    This is beautiful, I’m so happy I’ve seen first hand the blessings you’ve given to this birth mom and sweet MJ. The chance you took set so many wonderful things in motion. Your an amazing mom- keep sharing this mission.

    1. Jenni Anderson

      Well not for sure my first post got to you but what a loving caring special family you’ll have.
      I am adopted and this story is so touching to me, I had the most wonderful parents a girl could ever ask for and I miss them everyday!
      This is very inspirational an awesome thing that you all have done bringing in a child true loving home and giving him everything that he deserves unfair that you guys are awesome!!!!♥️

  7. Katie Q

    😭😭😭 so much love!

  8. Nic

    I love reading this- it’s amazing to go back after having heard the updates from you as this incredible part of life all started unfolding. ❤️ Inspirational journey and start to an even better story.

  9. Amanda Hansford

    Just brought to tears by this testament of how you are doing God’s work! I immediately thought of a passage in Isaiah—Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” This is so special. Thank you for sharing. Love you and your family.

  10. Stacy Powell

    Thank you for sharing!! Cant wait to read more.

  11. Lee Ann

    I love seeing this in writing!❤️

  12. LG

    Beautifully written, Katie and so touching. Thank you for sharing your journey with us.

  13. Jenni Anderson

    This is amazing to read!
    You two are wonderful people and this really touches my heart, being that I was adopted as well!
    I truly was blessed with wonderful parents as well and really love that you were willing to do this for someone else is so great!!!♥️

  14. Connie McEldowney

    I’m crying tears of hope and joy! Love you all!!!

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